Loving another does not ensure unending happiness. To love is to be vulnerable.” – C.S. Instead, according to Brené Brown (2015), writer and vulnerability researcher, “vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity.” It gives us hope, provides a sense of belonging, enables us to feel empathy, and provides meaning in our lives. Be vulnerable. For Lewis, and for us, love means opening our hearts to pain and sorrow. But that’s the point. Vulnerability begets love. When the relationship is severed, it causes us to question who we are. We naturally desire companionship, affection, fellowship. Please make sure all fields are filled out. She is married to Daniel, has four sons, and together they belong to Immanuel Baptist Church in Little Rock, Arkansas. You’re willing to give someone half your heart. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. Affiliate disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, we may earn commissions from qualifying purchases on Amazon.com. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. So also Christ loved through the darkest moments of the cross because he knew at the end he’d be glorified and his people would be redeemed. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. To Love is to be Vulnerable. The good news is that there's no better place to be sweetly 'held' in choosing love than The Making Love Retreat . Here’s why you need to be vulnerable to fall in love: 1. She is unsure of what other party’s intention might be … Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. The Gospel Coalition supports the church by providing resources that are trusted and timely, winsome and wise, and centered on the gospel of Jesus Christ. To last in love is to not give up. Copyright © 2021 The Gospel Coalition, INC. All Rights Reserved. To be vulnerable (and then to be accepted and understood) is the seed of love. Vulnerability is regarded as a key ingredient in healthy, fulfilling relationships. Clem Onojeghuo. For once we love someone, they have the unique power to hurt us as nobody else can. [Verse 1] ‘Selena’ starts by talking about being scared of investing in new relations. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. That’s always an option, but not the one I recommend. And we dare to be vulnerable to love … We become vulnerable, and then we love. Dedicated to your stories and ideas. For the First time in New Zealand! When Disciplining Kids Doesn’t Seem to Make a Difference. And on my most frightened days, I’m reminded of those wise words from my friend—to love is to be vulnerable. We see the other person’s willingness to be vulnerable, and then we love. There, the God who is love became vulnerable for sinners like you and me. Your heart is more vulnerable, but the love is worth it. The point is that I rarely allow myself to be vulnerable with other people. In fact, Christians more than anyone else can love with reckless abandon since we know this isn’t all there is. And we are grateful. Usually, right when we’re at the moment of being vulnerable, we bail. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Our hearts laid bare to vulnerability is not the end of the story. Like many other expecting and new moms, I struggle with nagging fear that something tragic will happen to my babies. So happy or sad, vulnerability happens. CORONAVIRUS vaccine cheats are skipping the jab queue by using an IT loophole, an investigation has claimed. Lewis in the “The Four Loves”. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. 12:2). You have to take the risk and ultimately know that your happiness is dependent upon you and your mindset. Anyone can leave. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. In the months leading up to my wedding I had a recurring dream. All of this requires opening our souls to others, thus making us susceptible to relational pain. You just have to love other people where they are at. Yet we do so anyway because deep within we know we were built for more than solitary existence. You may unsubscribe at any time. Let yourself feel everything with full intensity. Learn about us. Nowadays we are all concerned with the latest and greatest things we can get our hands on. This is because when we sense danger, we move away from it. November 4, 2014 November 4, 2014. Lewis, “To love is to be vulnerable.” Then they said something along the lines of “so true, this is why I can’t open up to you.” DON’T GIVE UP SO EASILY. Anyone can give up. Children rebel against us. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Vulnerability means you’re comfortable crying over the things that upset you instead of pushing away all of your emotions. The definition of ‘vulnerable’ from the Cambridge dictionary is: ‘able to be easily physically, emotionally, or mentally hurt, influenced or attacked.. It takes no bravery or resilience at all. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. For example, if we dare to love someone, we are vulnerable to the pain of being rejected. It is the result of loving Jesus. Lewis. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Nowhere do we see this more clearly than at Calvary. To be created in God’s image means to desire fellowship. In The Four Loves he writes: There is no safe investment. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. It can be losing a loved one, a breakup, a major disappointment, or just sharing in someone else’s pain. Make it your best one yet. They posted a quote by C.S. Lewis. A truly vulnerable person only seeks for love within, which already makes them a courageous, resilient person. To love another is a choice. In The Path of Loneliness she writes, “To love means to open ourselves to suffering. Letting ourselves feel happy is often a way to feel more vulnerable, not less. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love … All to defend against feeling vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. Yet deep within our souls we know we weren’t created for such a lonely existence. When we love Jesus, our love will flow out to others (1 John 4:20). To guard our hearts so that nothing can hurt us. That makes love hard. It’s a choice you make every day to decide to continue loving, to deal with all their little quirks and flaws, in the same way you would want yours to be overlooked. I regularly dreamed that something would happen to my fiancé. Obviously we can strive to control our defensive reaction. We are all constantly changing, sometimes in ways we can’t control, even if we wanted to. Vulnerable Lyrics Meaning. C. S. Lewis understood it well. Happily Ever After is for you to create, every single day of your life. Being vulnerable in a relationship means allowing your partner to know you fully: your thoughts, feelings, challenges, weaknesses. It can be scary to show those sides to … It’s the only way to live. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. Spouses disappoint us. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. It’s not just… To love someone in such a way, you have to take control of it. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. Because they have opened up all the closed doors within themselves, and accepted that they are indeed worthy of self-love and love from others, they can offer it openly and genuinely to other people. You have to be vulnerable because you’re choosing to be vulnerable. To keep going, and when something is working, take the time to fix it. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. But a quick look around reminds us that something is tragically wrong. But then again, what is a good ending? If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. “To love at all is to be vulnerable,” says C.S. That’s just the way we live, the way we have been conditioned to feel and carry out our lives. Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog. The Countries Where It’s Most Dangerous to Be a Christian in 2021, The FAQs: What Christians Should Know About QAnon, The Fantasy Ideology of the American Insurrectionists, Damn the Curse of Ham: How Genesis 9 Got Twisted into Racist Propaganda. I would wake up haunted by the thought that the man I loved so deeply would either die tragically or leave me for someone else. God didn’t fashion us void of feelings and emotions. As I shared my fears with a dear friend who had been married longer than I had, she spoke these encouraging words: Every time you open your heart to love like you are now doing, you open your heart to more hurt and pain. Let’s learn the meaning behind the lyrics of the song ‘Vulnerable’ by Selena Gomez section-wise. He knew the joy that awaited if he loved to the end (Heb. Fast forward four years and I’m now the mother of twin boys. I’ve had my heart broken many times, and i’m sure I still have a few more to go through before I find my “happy ever after”. We were made to love and be loved. It’s scary, and at times it’s downright depressing. I think it speaks so clearly about what it means to love anyone or anything. Contrary to what many folks were raised to believe, vulnerability is a measure of strength and courage, not weakness. But who would live sealed in spiritual cellophane just to keep from ever being hurt? Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. The only place outside of heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is hell. We often react by withdrawing into ourselves, or by withholding our loving behavior, or by trying to control our partner’s loving behavior. (I may have added the last bit.) I think it is safe to say that in this life we all experience heartbreak. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. Everything in life is uncertain, and the most uncertain and fallible thing is probably our feelings. Whatever we love will give the gift of pain somewhere along the road. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. vulnerable meaning: 1. able to be easily physically, emotionally, or mentally hurt, influenced, or attacked: 2. able…. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. A mother can love through the difficult months of pregnancy and the agonizing hours of labor because she knows at the end of the pain comes the baby she loves so deeply. When firmly rooted in its foundations, this is the kind of love that can last through the seasons. What can Americans—especially followers of Jesus Christ—do in a time when it seems that our very republic is more fragile than ever before? Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. CS Lewis has a famous quote from The Four Loves that begins with “To love at all is to be vulnerable …” He says that if you want to protect yourself, you can’t love anything at all, not even a pet, especially not a parrot. You can read more of her writing on her blog or follow her on Twitter. Elisabeth Elliot knew better than most what it meant to love and lose. This is one of my favorite quotes from C.S. When God created Adam, he declared it wasn’t good for him to be alone (Gen. 2:18). Choose The One Who Can Love You The Way You Need, 10 Things I Learned About Love From Watching My Friends Get Their Hearts Broken, The Truth About Intimacy And HS, From Someone Who Has Had It For 23 Years, 18 Quotes About Vulnerability That Will Inspire You To Be Brave, What Happens When You Make Yourself Vulnerable, To Say ‘Yes’ To Love Is To Say ‘Yes’ To Pain, This Is Why Strong Girls Are The Most Vulnerable In Love, A Quote That Will Completely Change The Way You Think About Love. When we allow ourselves to be completely open and vulnerable, we benefit, our relationships improve, and we may even become more attractive. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. This is why the pain of loneliness is often too much to bear. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. It wasn’t good for Adam to be alone because the Trinity isn’t alone. We can’t pretend as Christians that we’re immune to the ravages of sin, death, and sorrow any more than we can retreat from all things relational. If love is worth the risk, as it always, always is, then we must choose to become vulnerable and allow Jesus to break open our wounds, exposing them to the possibility of rejection but also to the possibility of acceptance and conversion. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Christians can love with the same freedom. Being sexually vulnerable means choosing love, not choosing the other, but choosing love, and being willing to meet those inner barriers with love. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. we do not focus on who hurt us, whether in the past or the present or potentially in the future. “Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. Learn more. To give them the power to destroy you or rebuild you. Family members die and leave us. The reason why some of us so much love children is that we feel an intrinsic comfort in the presence of authenticity. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. Now, the danger your body senses is you becoming emotionally attached and developing feelings. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. The fear to be let down after being truly opened to another person Vulnerability can actually make you happier. Links circulating on Whatsapp and … "Any love makes us vulnerable. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. The only alternative would be to live without love—to be alone forever. This is the official definition of being vulnerable. Shall we shut our doors to love, then and ‘be safe’?” That’s the only alternative, really. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. but we remember who were the ones who first loved us, and which ones of them still do. While I had my fair share of dreams about my dress not fitting or forgetting to complete some vital detail, the one that haunted me was much darker. But, it can also be beautiful, exhilarating and the best thing you ever decide to do. While there’s no promise of cost-free love, we know the deeper purpose behind it all. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. If we only chose to love in situations free from vulnerability, we’d never love at all. It’s hard. Vulnerability means that you’re willing to jump headfirst into love. If my life were so richly blessed, there is an abundance of this kind of love and I would never have to feel vulnerable. But locking ourselves up and never facing another person won’t fix what’s really going on in our souls. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. This isn’t a new concept. You will probably get hurt, most likely disappointed, but what’s living if you aren’t going to love in the full capacity you are capable of? To love is to be vulnerable.” ― C.S. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It comes in many forms and over many different things. “To love is to be vulnerable. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. But when it comes to actually being vulnerable in real life, many of us struggle to open up. Jesus is not asking … How do you show vulnerability without crossing over into needy territory? There’s so much meaning behind it and it’s something I struggle with innately. Don’t rely on anyone or anything to create it for you. How to be vulnerable with a man? Trust is a big word. But love also begets vulnerability. Friends betray us. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. That requires a tender or a vulnerable heart. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Learn more about working with Thought Catalog. One is that love makes us feel vulnerable, which then scares us. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Lewis, The Four Loves. If you’re going to be in a relationship, you might as well get used to speaking your mind and pouring out your soul to this person or else you should definitely stay single. Avoiding it in an effort to feel good doesn’t work. Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Feeling all … It was a nightmare, really. Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. He experienced the greatest pain imaginable—the death of his only Son—so that we could be made right with him. Sometimes it seems easier and more logical to just not love anyone at all. You have to take responsibility for it. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. Courtney Reissig is the author of Glory in the Ordinary: Why Your Work in the Home Matters to God, The Accidental Feminist: Restoring Our Delight in God’s Good Design, and Teach Me to Feel: Worshiping Through the Psalms in Every Season of Life (January 2020). 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